[2000] Tulsa Family News, April 2000; Volume 7, Issue 4

[2000] Tulsa Family News, April 2000; Volume 7, Issue 4

Politics, education, and social conversation toward Tulsa’s Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual communities.

Tulsa Family News was a monthly newspaper; No. 1 issued December 1993-January 1994. The final issue available was published in September 0f 2001 (Volume 8, Issue 9).

The newspaper brings up important, evolving topics of marriage, Pride, TOHR, HIV/AIDs, events, advice, and politics all at the local and national level.

This document is available in searchable PDF attached. It is also available to be seen at the Dennis R. Neill Equality Center with permission.

Tulsa Family News

https://history.okeq.org/collections/show/24

Tom Neal

April 2000

James Christjohn
Barry Hensley
J.P. Legranbouche
Lamont Lindstrom
Esther Rothblum
Mary Schepers

Tom Neal/Tulsa Family News

Tulsa Family News, March 2000; Volume 7, Issue 3

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PDF
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https://history.okeq.org/items/show/599

Tulsa(Oklahoma)---newspaper
Tulsa---Oklahoma
Oklahoma---Tulsa
United States Oklahoma Tulsa
United States of America (50 states)

Berlin Exhibit Looks at
Gay Victims of Nazis
by Paul Geitner, Associated Press Writer
BERLIN (AP) - Focusing attention on along-neglected
group of Nazi victims, a two-part exhibition about Gays
persecuted under the Nazis opened Sunday at museums
m Berlin and in a former concentration camp where
many of the victims were killed.
The exhibits of documents, photos, drawings and
other objects collected during 10 years ofresearchis the
largest on the subject ever mountedinGermany, project
organizers said. It documents the fate of700individuals
who suffered under the Nazis’ draconian anti-Gay laws
and tells 60 personal stories.
"We want to return to the Gay victims of the Nazis
theirnames and to show their lives, as far as possible, so
as to.at, least symbolically liberate them.from the dehumamzmg
barbarity of the Nazis,’" said Andreas
Stemweiler, project director at the Gay Museum in
Berlin, where part of the exhibit is being shown.
The other half opened at the Sachsenhausen concentration
camp, where many Gay men - labded with a
.pink triangle- ended up because of the camp’s proxim-
,ty to the capital, see Nazis, p.3
Be Counted: Effort to
Include Gays in Census
SAN JOSE, Calif. (AP) - A national campaign to
include Gays and Lesbians in Census 2000 is urging
same-sex couples to check offtheboxindicating they’re
unmarried partners.
Using e-mail, ads in Gay publications and word-ofmouth,
thecampaign is an un0fficial way to get a partial
indication of the nation’s Gay and Lesbian population,
the San Jose Mercury News reported recently. "We
want to make the point that there is such a thing as a Gay
or Lesbianfamily,’" said PaulaEttelbrick, family policy
director for the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.
The federal government added the unmarried partners
category to the census in 1990, to recognize heterosexual
couples who live together without being married.
That year, 150,000 same-sex households were
identified. "It was a vast undercount,’" said Ann
Northrop, board member for the Institute for Gay and
Lesbian Strategic Studies.
Those involved in the so-called "Out the Census’"
campaign say that even though individual Gays and
Lesbians won’t be counted, the number of couples will
provide a partial account. And additional information
included on U.S. Census forms could provide a valuable
snapshot of the community, including income levels,
ethnicity and the number of same-sex couples raising
children.
While the campaign is getting nationwide attention,
some Gays and Lesbians are wary ofrevealing toomuch
information. Rikki Westerschulte, who is raising a
daughterwith herparmer, says sheknows many couples
who are nervous about declaring their sexual orientation
on an official government form.
The recent passage of Proposition 22, which recognizes
only marriage between a man and a woman in
California, adds to the suspicion. "You walk down the
hall at work and wonder, ’Who is it I think I can trust,
who really feels I’m immoral?’ "Westerschnlte asked.
Other couples are angry they cannot declare themselves
as married, see Census, p. 11
Serving Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual + Transgendered Tulsans, Our Families + Friends
Tulsa’s Largest Circulation Community PaperAvailable In More Than 75 City Locations
Camme,rmeyer .To Join
Lougan s at Pr de 2000
TULSA - Last month, the organizers of Diversity Festival 2000
announced that US Olympic champion, Greg Louganis, would
serve as Grand Marshall for the° Millennium Pride Parade this
June. This month, organizers confirmed that Dr. Grethe
Cammermeyer, distiguished veteran of the United States Armed
Forces, will join Louganis as grand marshall.
Cammermeyer challenged
US anti-Gay/Lesbian policies
which forced her out of her
nursing positionin the United
States Reserve forces. Her
lifestory was madeinto a television
film produced by
Barbra Streisand, starring
Glenn Close.
Cammermeyerhas come to
Tulsa before. She spoke at
the Universi ty of Tulsa in the
spring of 1995 to an audience
of about 300 Tulsa Family
New~ writer Lauri Cooper
shown in the photo at right
interviewed Cammermeyer.
The week of Pride events begins with an interfaith worship
service to be held at the Tulsa Performing Arts Center. The
Reverend Dr. Mel White, author and civil rights activist, will be
the principle speaker at this event. White will lead a workshop
also to be held at the PAC on Saturday, June 3, from 2-5pm (free)
on the principles of non-violent social change.
Lougams will speak at a black tie optional dinner to be held at
the prestigious Summi t Club on Friday, June 9th. Tickets for the
event are $75/person and there will be a VIP reception at $50/
person. These events will benefit Tulsa Oklahomans for Human
Rights, the parent organization of the Gay Community Center
and Oklahoma’ s oldest Lesbian and Gay non-religious organization.
Organizers anticipate that the parade will follow the sameroute
as last year,
Cooper & Cammermeyer
SoulForee in Oklahoma
Members of Soulforce in Oklahoma Marched at
the Martin Luther King, Jr. Parade in January.
TULSA- Oklahoma’s oldest Gay and Lesbian organizataon is a
religious one, the congregation now know as MCC United, the
Metropolitan Community Church United. So perhaps it is fitting
that one of Oklahoma’s newest community organizations also
has religious roots. "Soulforce in Oklahoma" is part of an effort
begun by the Rev. Mel White and his spouse Gary Nixon.
Soulforce is an ecumenical network of volunteers committed
to teaching and applying the principles ofnon-violence on behalf
ofsexnal minorities. Thename derives from the workofMohandas
Karamchand Gandhi, a leader of India’s independence movement.
Soulforce or truth force is a translation of "satyagraha" a
concept Gandhi began developing as a young lawyer fighting for
racial justice in South Africa. Gandhi’s thinking greatly influenced
the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. in his work for civil
rights for Black Americans.
The goals of Soulforce are to end the suffering ofLesbian, Gay,
Bisexual and Transgendered persons, to change the minds and
hearts of religious leaders whose anti-Gay campaigns lead directly
and indirectly to that suffering, to be guided by the
principles of "relentless non-violent resistance, and through this,
try to bring hope and healing to society.
In Tulsa, Soulforce was organized by individuals involved in
MCC United and the group has been holding regular meetings at
the Gay Community Services Center. see Soul, p. 7
¯
Tulsan Chosen
For HRC Board
¯ Fundraiser Audra Sommers
: To Join Marty Newman in DC
¯ TULSA - Audra Sommers, who is planning an
¯¯ AIDS benefit in Tulsa next month, has gained
national recognition
¯ forher humanrights
- efforts. Sommers
¯ has been named to
the Board of Gover-
¯ nors of the Human
¯ Rights Campaign, a
¯ 300,000-member
national organlza-
¯ tion that batdes dis-
-¯ crimination against
sexual minorities.
¯
As a board mere-
¯ ber, Audra will be
¯ responsible for re-
. cmiting, promoting
¯ awareness ofhuman rights issues in Oklahoma and
¯ serving as a liaison between Oklahoma and the
¯ national organization in Washington, DC, where ¯
she will be heading for orientation this month. "I’m
¯ really, really happy that I was appointed, to the
: Board of Governors," she said.
¯ Sommers joins Tulsan Marty Newman on the ¯
Board of Governors. Newman expressed delight
: with Sommers selection. "Audra has a ~roven
.. history of work on behalf of the commumty, and
¯ she has an enormous number of people wholook to ¯
her leadership," noted Newman. He added that
." HRC is concentrating its effolas on Tulsa at this
¯ time and he feels Sommers will add immeasurably ¯
to HRC’s strengths.
see Audra, p.3
Audra Sommers
Pentagon Admits Hate
Speech is Widespread
by Robert Burns, AP Military Writer
WASHINGTON (AP) - Anti-Gay speech and harassment
is commonplace in the U.S. military,
especially among young enlisted troops, according
to a Pentagon inspector general’s survey. 85% of
those surveyed said they believed that anti-Gay
comments are tolerated on their base or aboard
their ship, and 37% said they had personally witnessed
or been the target of harassment - such as
hostile gestures, graffiti or physical assault- based
on perceived homosexuality.
The survey released last month also found a
widespread belief among troops that the Clinton
administration’s so-called "don’t ask, don’t tell’"
policy on Gays in the military - which Vice President
A1 Gore says he would eliminate if he were
elected president-is not working. President Clinton
himself has said the policy, forged in 1993, is now
"’out of whack.’"
Defense Secretary William Cohen, responding
to theinspector general’ s survey results, announced
he was creating a committee of military and civilian
officials to draft a plan for measures to improve
the policy’s implementation. Cohen put the onus
on military chiefs to fix the problem. "The report
shows that military leaders must do more to make
it clear that harassment based on sexual orientation
violates military values,’" Cohen said in a memo to
the military chiefs and service secretaries.
The administration’s policy, set in law by Congress
in 1993 after a heated political battle, says
Gays and Lesbians may serve in the military so
long as they keep their sexual orientation to themselves.
Dubbed "don’t ask, don’t tell,’" the policy
still bars openly homosexual people from serving
in uniform. Although the policy was designed to
make it easier for Gays to serve, an increasing
number have been discharged in recent years.
see Pentagon, p..10
Tulsa Clubs & Restaurants
*Chasers, 4812 E. 33 712-2324
*CW’s, 1737 S. Memorial 610-5323
Full Moon Cafe, 1525 E. 15th 583-6666
*Gold Coast Coffee House, 3509 S. Peoria 749-4511
Polo Grill, 2038 Utica Square 744-4280
*St. Michael’s Alley Restaurant, 3324-L E. 31st 745-9998
*The Star, 1565 Sheridan 834-4234
*The Storm, 2182:S. Sheridan 835-2376
*Renegi~des/Rainbow Room, 1649 S. Main 585-3405
*TNT’s, 2114 S. Memorial 660-0856
*Tool Box, 1338 E. 3rd 584-1308
*The Yellow ~rick Road Pub, 2630 E. 15th , 749-15.63
Ailyanced:Wi~el~Ss 8~:PCS; Digital Cellular ~: ’~ 74%1~08)
*Assoc.. in- Med. &M~ntal Health, 2325 S I Harvard 743- t000
Kent Balch & Associates, Health & Life Insurance 747-9506
*Barnes & Noble Booksellers, 8620 E. 71 250-5034
Cherry St. Psychotherapy, 1515 S. Lewis
*Barnes & Noble Booksellers, 5231 E. 4I 665-4580 ¯
Body Piercing by Nicole, 2722 E. 15 712-1122 -"
*Borders Books & Music, 2740 E. 21 712-9955 :
*Borders Books & Music, 8015 S. Yale 494-2665 ,"
Brookside Jewelry, 4649 S. Peoria 743-5272 ¯
*CD Warehouse, 3807c S. Peoria 746-0313 :
581-0902,743-4117 ;
Community Cleaning, Kerby Baker 622-0700 ¯
Tim Daniel, Attorney 352-9504, 800-742-9468 ¯
¯Deco to Disco, 3212 E. 15th 749-3620 "
¯Devena’s Gallery, 13Brady 587-2611 "
Doghouse on Brookside, 3311 S. Peoria 744-5556 :
¯Elite Books & Videos, 821 S Sheridan 838-8503 ¯
¯Ross Edward Salon 584-0337, 712-9379 "
Events Unlimited, 507 S. Main 592-0460 "
¯Floral Design Studio, 3404 S,~eoria 744-9595 ¯
Four Star Import Automotive, 9906 E. 55th P1. 610-0880 ¯
Cathy Furlong, Ph.D., 1980 Utica Sq. Med. Ctr. 628-3709 ¯
Gay & Lesbian Affordable Daycare 808-8026 ¯
¯Gloria Jean’s Gourmet Coffee, 1758 E. 21st 742-1460 ¯
Learme M. Gross, Insurance & financial planning 459-9349 "
Mark T. Hamby, Attorney 744-7440 "
¯Sandra J. Hi~.’.ll, MS, Psychotherapy, 2865 E. Skelly 745-1111 "_
¯International Touts ~ 341-6866
Jacox AnimaiClinic, 2732 E. 15th 712-2750 ]
¯Jared’~ Antiques,~]602 E. 15th ~ " ~582-30i8 :
David Kauskey,. Country Club Barbering 747-0236 :
The Keepers, Housekeeping &Gardening 582-8460 ¯
¯Ken’s Flowers; 1635 E. 15 599-8070 ,"
Kelly Kirby, CPA, 4021 :S. Harvard, #210 747:5466 ",
¯Living ArtSpace, 308 South Kenosha 585-1234 ¯
¯Midtown Theater, 319E. 3rd 584-3112 ¯
Mingo Valley Flowers, 9720c E. 31 663-5934 "
¯Mohawk Music, 6157 E 51 Place 664-2951 ¯
Puppy Pause II, t060 S. Mingo 838-7626 ¯
¯Thh Pride Store, 1307 E. 38, 2nd floor 743-4297 ",
Rainbowz on the River B+B, POB 696, 74101 747-5932 "
Richard’s Carpet Cleaning 834-0617 "
Teri Schutt, Rex Realtors 834-7921, 747-4746
Scribner’s Bookstore, 1942 Utica Square 749-6301 ¯
Paul Tay, Car Salesman 260-7829 ¯
¯Tulsa Comedy Club, 6906 S. Lewis 481-0558
Venus Salon, 1247 S. Harvard 835-5563
Fred Welch, LCSW, Counseling " 743-1733 "
¯Wherehouse Music, 5150 S. Sheridan 665-2222 "
¯Whittier News Stand, 1 N. Lewis 592-0767 "
Tulsa Agencies, Churches, Schools & Universities "
AIDS Walk Tulsa, POB 4337, 74101 579,9593
All Souls Unitarian Church, 2952 S. Peoria 743-2363
Black & White, Inc. POB 14001, Tulsa 74159 587-7314
Bless The Lord at All Times ~tiristian Cdn’t~r, 2207 E~ ~5 ....583-78"15
¯B/IAG/T Alliance, Univ. of Tulsa United Min. Ctr. 583-9780
¯Chamber of Commerce Bldg., 616 S. Boston 585-1201
¯Chapman Student Ctr., University of Tulsa, 5th P1. &Florence
¯Churchof the RestorationUU~ !3 l~N.Greenwood 587-1314
¯Comm’~ty ofHope United Methotttst, 2545 S. Yale 747-6300
¯Communi~ Uniti{rian-Universalist~ongregati0n 749-0595
,Council Oak Men’s Chorale 748-3888
¯Delaware Playhouse, 1511 S. Delaware 712-1511
¯Democratic Headquarters, 3930 E. 31 742-2457
Dignity/Integrity of Tnlsa - Lesbian & Gay Catholics &
.... Episcopalians, POB 701475, 74170-1475 355-3140
¯Fellowship Congreg. Church, 2900 S. Harvard 747-7777
¯Free Spirit Women’s Center, call for location &info: 587-4669
Friend For A Friend, POB 52344, 74152 747-6827
918.583.1248, fax: 583.4615
POB 41413, Tulsa, OK 74159
e-mail: TulsaNews@ ear~hlinlc net
Publisher + Editor:
Tom Neal
Writers + contributors:
James Chfistjohn, Barry Hensley, J.-P. Legrandbouche,
Lamont Lindstrom, Esther Rothblum, Mary Schepers
Member of The Associated Press
Issued on or before the 1st of each month, the entire contents
of.-.thi’s publ~cati6n are protected byUS copyright 1~98 by
i~r~ ~4~ /~1~u4 and may not be reprodu~.d either in
whole orin pm:twithout written permission from the publisher.
Publication of a name or photo does not indicate a person’s
sexual orientation. Correspondence is assumed to be for
publication unless otherwise noted, must be signed & becomes
the sole property of T~,~t F¢~.’. N~÷ Each reader
is entitled to 4 copies of each editaon at distribution
points. Additional copies are available by calling 583-1248.
Friends in Unity Social Org., POB 8542, 74101 582-0438
HIV ER Center, 4138 Chas. Page Blvd. 583-6611
*Tulsa C.A.R.E.S., 3507 E. Admiral 834-4194
Holland Hall School, 5666 E. 81 st 481.1111
HOPE, HIV Outreach, Prevention, Education 834-8378
*House of the Holy Spirit Minstries, 3210e So. Norwood
Interfaith AIDS Ministries 438~2437, 800-284-2437
*MCt~ United, 1623 N. Maplewood 838-1715
NAMES Project, 3507 E. Admiral P1. 748-3111
NOW, Nat’l Org. for Women, POB 14068, 74159 365-5658
OK Spokes Club (bicycling), POB 9165, 74157
*OSU-Tulsa
PFLAG, POB 52800, 74152 749-4901
*Planned Parenthood, 1007 S. Peoria 587-7674
Prime-Timers, P.O. Box52118, 74152
R.A.I.N., Regional AIDS Interfaith Network 749-4195
*Red Rock Mental Center, 1724 E. 8 584-2325
O’RYAN, support group:[<~r t8-24 LGBT young adults
O’RYAN, Jr. support.group for 14-17 LGBT youth
S.t.Aidan. s Eptseop Church, 4045 N. Cincinnati 425~7882
St. Dunstan’s Episcopal, 5635 E. 71st 492:7140
*St. Jerome’s Parish Church, 205 W. King 582-3088
*Tulsa Area United Way, 1430 S. Boulder 583-7171
*TNAAPP (Native American men), Indian Health Care 582-7225
Tulsa County Health Deparunent, 4616 E. 15 5954105
Confidential HIV Testing - by appt. on.Thursdays only
743-4297
298-0827
Tulsa Okla. for HumanRights, c/o The Pride Center
T.U.L.S.A. Tulsa Uniform/Leather Seekers Assoc.
*Tulsa City Hall, Ground Floor Vestibule
*Tulsa Community College Campuses
*Tulsa Gay Community Center, 1307 E. 38, 74105
Unity Church ofChristianity, 3355 S. Jamestown
BARTLESVILLE
743-4297
749-8833
*Bartlesville Public Library, 600 S. Johnstone 918-337-5353
OKLAHOMA CITY/NORMAN
Bdtders Books & Music, 3209 NWExpressway 405-848-2667
Borders Books & Music, 300 Norman Center 405-573-4907
TAHLEQUAH
Stonewall League, call for information: 918-456-7900
*Tatdequah Unitarian-Universalist Church 918-456-7900
Green Country AIDS Coalition, POB 1570 918-453-9360
NSU School of Optometry, 1001 N. Grand
HIVtesting every other Tues. 5:30-8:30, call for dates
: EUREKA SPRINGS, ARKANSAS
":- 32utunui Bi~ceze- ~dstaurant, Hwy. 23
¯ *1ira & Brent’s Bistro, 173 S. Main
DeVito’s Restaurant, 5 Center St.
¯ Emerald Rainbow, 45 &l/2 Spring St.
; MCC of the Living Spnng
¯ Geek to Go!, PC. Specialist, POB 429
Old Jailhouse Lodging, 15 Montgomery
; Positive Idea Marketing Plans
; Sparky’s,Hwy. 62 East
¯ White Light, 1 Center St.
JOPLIN, MISSOURI
¯ *Spirit of Christ MCC, 2639 E. 32, Ste. U134
501-253-7734
501-253-7457
501-253-6807
501-253-5445
501-253-9337
501-253-2776
501-253-5332
501-624-6646
501-253-6001
501-253-4074
417-623-4696
* is where you can f’md TFN. Not all are Gay-owned but all are Gay"friendly.
Some 600 homosexuals were killed there
between 1939 and mid-1943 alone, according
to the researchers.
The Nazi anti-Gay law,knownas "Paragraph
175,’" was directly solely against
Gay men, since the Nazis were mainly
concerned with perceived threats to their
ideal of Aryan manhood. Lesbians were
generally ignored, although some were
arrested as "asocials’" or "prostitutes.’"
Few surviving victims ever came forward
after World War II because of continning
stigmaassociated withhomosexualkty,
whicl~remained illegal in West Germfiny
~mder the sam~ Nazi law until 1969:
Tens of thousands of men were prosecuted
in those postwar years.
Historians also generally ignored the
Nazi per.s..e~..u;~n of homosexuals until
the 1980s, meaning many survivors had’
already passedaway, organizers said. Only
a handful are known to still be alive; their
stories are told in a U.S.-made documentary,"
Paragraph 175,’" whichwon awards
at film festivals in Berlin and at Sundance
this year.
Germany’s center-left government introduced
a bill last week - 55 years after
the end of the war - that would require
parliament to officially recognize and
apologize to Gay victims. It also calls on
the government to study whether a blanket
annulment should be issued for convictions
under the Nazi anti-Gay law,
under which even a glance between men
could be cause for prosecution. -
Guenter Morsch, director of tli’~
Sachsenhansen memorial, noted that protests
erupted after the first plaque dedicated
to Gay victims of the Nazis was
hung at the Dachau concentration camp
outside Munich in the 1980s. Last year,
Germany’s national Holocaust memorial
day commemorated Gay victims for the
first time with .a ceremony at
S~lchsenhansen. Events like that and the
¯ new exhibit are important, he said, be-
; cause all groups - not just those that are
¯ "politically correct’" - must be remem-
-"- bered if tolerance is to be promoted.
: About 200,000 people were interred at
Sachsenhausen between 1936 and 1945;
: including Jews, Roma, communists ",rod
¯ other political prisoners. More than 1,400
Jews were killed there, thousands more
sent off to be killed in Auschwitz. Others
were forced to work in adjacent factories.
You mayfind the Gay Museum at
www.schwulesmuseum.de
Audra, who is also a volunteer fund-
¯ raiser, is currently producing her largest
¯ event to date, a three-hourAIDS benefit at
Tulsa’s Performing Arts Center that wi’ll
~ feature Thrifty president Don Himelfarb
: as keynote speaker.
¯ ThePAC show,"Connecting the Hearts
¯ ofTulsa,"is scheduledforApri120 atTpm
¯ and will benefit Tulsa C.A.R.E.S. Fea-
¯ tured performers include Debbie ¯
Campbell, Rebecca Ungerman and
¯ children’s musical groups from All Souls
¯ Unitarian Church.
¯ The John H. Williams Theater seats
429, andAudrahopes to sellit0ut. Tickets
¯ are $10 general admission, $20 VIP seat.-
," ing, and $5 students.
¯ For more information or tickets, call
~ 832-7919. see Audra, p. 3
by Lamont Lindstrom, Ph.D. :
"Unmarried Partner." That’s the U.S. ¯
Census 2000 official term for boyfriends ;
and girlfriends. It’s either that or else you "
check Husband/Wife, Roomer/Boarder, ¯
Housemate/Roommate, or Other "
Nonrelative. ¯
How should I label my live-in? I can’t ¯
call him Husband or Wife. He’s not a :
Boarder. He’s much more than a RoOm- "
mate. (TheCen~uginfbmas us tha~ Room- ¯
mates "share living quarters primarily to :
share expenses.") AndOther Nonrelative; :
although correct, is hopelessly inadequate.
So, for lack of better alternative, the boyfriend
must be an Unmarried Partner.
I am pleased to see the Census Bureau
demands, rather romantically, that the
Unmarried Partnerhave"aclose personal
relationship with Person 1" (that is, with
me). I know some Unmarried Partners °
whose onetime close personal relations :
have aged into an icy and tight-lipped co- ¯
erastence. "
The Census, as a condensed.form of "
Ameri~anculturalpresumption, thinks that :
people really ought tO be related to their -
roommates either by blood or by marriage.
Anthropologists call such presumptions
"residencerules"- expectation about
who should live with whom. There are
patrilocal and matrilocal societies where
children live with either father’s or
mother’~ people. In avunculocal situations
-the tropical Trobriand Islands -
hildren move an with mother s brothers.
Where virilocal rules arefollowed, women
reside with their new husbands. Or there
is theuxorilocal opposite: traditional Hopi
Indian grooms, for example, move’ their
belongings into their bride’g house. And
there isthe "neolocal" U.S. where all
couples should establish new, independent
households.
All these patterns describe the co-residency
of kin, and the American situation
is no different. Most of us live with relafives
as we grow up: "mothers, fathers,
sis{~s, and brothers. And most of us live
with even more relatives after we marry:
husbands, wives, sons, and daughters.
There are just two anomalous periods in
mostAmericanlife cycles when wemight
find ourselves living with non-kin (with
"Other Nonrelatives," according to Census
language). The first consists of the
few years between leaving morn and dad
behind and marriage.
This typically is the time of higher
educalionwhen young twenty-somethings
pile up in dormitories, fraternities, sororities,
and shared apartments. The second
comes with old age. We agomze over the
mor~ity of farming mom out to some
nursing home ward full of strangers.
The experience of life with non-kin and
strangers is fraught with aggravations and
difficulties. The common bathrooms,
those dirty dishes, the housemate’s woeful
taste in music. Life with mere friends
or roommates is rocky and unstable. My
nervous students busy themselves with
inventing "fictive kinship" labels for one
another. They pretend that the co-residents
in their sororities or fraternities are
"just like" their sisters and brothers. And
they watch a lot of "Friends," relying on
Hollywood to romanticize and make fun
of the peculiar experience of sharing their
toilet seats with the "Other Nonrelated."
Weare broughtup to live with relatives.
Sbared residence withkin is easier for two
reasons. We are morally obliged to forgive
the exasperations of our revolting
brothers that we would never stand from
a friend. And we ablemore easily to take
our revenge on our irksome siblings,
spouses, orchildren, unconstrainedby the
politeness conventions that govern our
relations with non-kin. Wash those dishes
or you are grounded! Pick up your filthy
socks, slob!
Gays and Lesbians are in something of
a residential quandary: many of us never
mo~e beyondthis stageof life with nonkin.
Straights leave behind theirfew years
of shared apartments and dormitories to
¯ return to new households composed of
:. kin. But since Gays and Lesbians cannot
¯ marry, officially at least, we live out our
lives with roommates, other nonrelatives,
¯ and unmarried partners.
¯ This perhaps explains some of the fra- ¯
gility ofGay households. "It’sMyWay or
the Highway!" is easier to demand when
you aren’t shouting at relatives. Many of
us havemetguys whowereperfectcouples
before they made the fatal mistake of
moving m together. And we have other
friends who are resigned to living solo.
No spare toothbrushes in theirbathrooms.
They’ve relied too often on the unkind=
hess of strangers.
Soyou snoopingFedenumerators, come
along and count me. I’m checking the
Unmarried Partner box. At the moment at
least, I’m happily living with the UP. I
realize, given American cultural patterns,
that the non-kin structure of our household
is anomalous. It will require extra
effort and forgiveness to keep it going.
Forget or forgive those badly squeezed
.toothpaste tubes. TheUPis neitherbrother
nor spouse but t still want him arodttfl"to
be counted in 2010: ,-:~:
LamontLindstrorn teaches anttfOl~lbgy
at the University of Tulsa.
Among the. survey’s key findings:
- 80% of the 71,500 members of the
Army, Air Force, Navy and Marine Corps
surveyed said they had heard offensive
speech or jokes or derogatory names or
remarks about Gays in the past year. The
service members were not asked if they
had. participated in such behavior.
-33% said they heard it often. It was
reported most frequently in the Marine
Corps and least in the Air Force. Such
behavior was reported to be most common
among junior enlisted troops.
--Of the offensive behaviors or actions
reported as directed against Gays, offensive
speech was the most common. It was
mentioned by 89% of those who reported
witnessing or experiencing some form of
harassment. Hostile gestures were reported
by 35%; threats or intimidation by 20%;
graffiti by 15%, vandalism of personal
property by 7% and physical assault by
9%.
The survey was done on 38 U.S. military
bases and aboard 10 Navy ships and
one submarine from Jan. 24 to Feb. 11.
The spark that caused the Pentagon to
take a closer look at how the Gay policy is
being implemented - and the extent of
anti-Gay behavior in the field - was the
bludgeoning death lastJuly ofaGay Army
private, Barry Winchell, at FortCampbell,
Kentucky. His killer, a fellow Army private,
was convicted and sentenced to life
in prison.
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Mississippi House Bans
Adoptions by Gays
JACKSON, Miss. (AP) - Mississippi may become
the second state with a law banning homosexual
couples from adopting children, althoughlawmakers
embracing the idea say they are unaware of any cases
ofGay adoptive parents. The House approved theban
with no debate late in March, nearly a week after a
similar proposal died for lack of action. The adoption
ban was revived after an orchestrated phone call
campaign by supporters.
Only Florida has a law forbidding Gay adoptions,
but other stateshave policies that keep homosexuals
from seeking adoptions. Bill opponents and supporters
said they were unaware of adoptions in Mississippi
involving Gay couples or any couples hoping to
adopt.
Mississippi Baptists and the Tupelo-based American
Family Association had lined up in support of the
proposal. On the other side were the American Civil
Liberties Union, which has threatened alawsuit, and
homosexual groups.
"It’s ridiculous,’" said Eddie Sandifer of Jackson,
director of the Mississippi Gay and Lesbian Alliance.
"This is going to be in court. It’s just a waste of
taxpayers’ money. They know there’s going to be a
lawsuit and they’ll lose eventually.’"
House Public Health Commi ttee Chairman Bobby
Moody, D-Louisville, said, "ff it’s the right thing to
do, it doesn’t matter to me if it leads to a lawsuit or
not.’" "What constitutes a family is not a homosexual
couple,’" s~iid Moody.
The bill was approved 107-8. There could be an
attempt for a second vote. "That bill is of the assumption
that anybody who’s Gay wilt,abuse children.
That’ s not a good ~rgument. I can’tjudge one’ s moral
turpitude. I’m not qualified to do that,’" said Rep.
David Green, D-Gloster.
This is the second time in three years that Mississippi
lawmakers have gotten involved in Gay issues.
In 1997, they banned homosexual marriages. The
adoption ban was added to a bill dealing with nurse
practitioners. That proposal lets the practitioners prepare
paperwork about the physical or mental condi- -
tion of a child being put up for adoption. Now doctors
must do the paperwork.
Moody said the House vote came in response to a
public outcry. "There’s been a lot of publicity created
around the state. It gave the false impression to some
religious groups that it was happening or there was a
possibility it could happen,’" he said of adoptions by
Gay couples.
Rep. Mary Coleman, D-Jackson, said lawmakers
"’were infringing on people’s private lives.’" David
Ingebretsen, director of theACLU in Mississippi, has
said his group may sue on behalf of aGay couple if the
bill becomes law. Other states have been sued over
their adoption policies. The bill does not ban a Gay
individiml from trying to adopt a child. It goes back to
the Senate for more consideration.
PlanetOut Website and
Advocate/Out to Merge
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) - PlanetOut, which caters
to Gays and Lesbians, has announced plans to acquire
Liberation Publications, the largest publisher of Gay
and Lesbian periodicals and books in the country.
Liberatiofi Publications Inc. produces the Advocate
newsmagazine and will soon own Out magazine.
Terms of the deal were not disclosed. The companies
describe the deal as a merger, but the Interact
company will be the dominant partner; allowing the
magazines "tO continue publishing under their own
brand names.
"You can characterize it as the AOL-Time Warner
in the Gay space,’" said Megan J. Smith,.chief executive
of PlanetOut. Her five-year-old company operates
the Web site
www.planetout.com, along with an online radio and
film service and PlanetOut TV, which airs on the site
and on Canadian television.
In 1996, the San Francisco-based site became the
first Gay-oriented enterprise to secure venture capital
funding. The company has since established parmerships
with AOL, Netscape, Yahoo! and other major
Web companies as well as made advertising agreements
with Arista Records, Virgin Adantic Airways
and Johnson & Johnson.
Liberation Publications is based in Los Angeles. It
announced Feb. 21 that it. would acquire New Yorkbased
Out Publishing Inc., the publisher of Out and
HIV+ magazines.
The Advocate, a 33-year-old bi-weekly with a
circulation of about 88,000, concentrates on news,
politics, business and medical information. Out~ a
monthly launchedin 1992, has a circulation of 115,000
and focuses on culture, entertainment, fitness and
other topics. The Gay marketis considered a prime for
Intemet players because a high percentage of Gays
and Lesbians use the Internet and because the Intemet
)rovides.a level Of anonymity.
Dr. Schlessinger’s TV
Show Draws Protesters
LOS ANGELES (AP) - Paramount Television says it
is committed to putting tough-talking Dr. Laura
Schlessinger on TV, the tough-talking protests of
hundreds of angry Dr. Laura demonstrators notwithstanding.
"Shame, shame, shame,’" more than 200
Gay civil rights protesters shouted outside Paramount
Pictures, where they demanded the studio drop plans
to put the controversial radio host on television this
fall.
Schlessinger, known to her listeners as Dr. Laura,
dispenses relationship advice onher enormously popular
radio show. She has called homosexuality a"biological
error’" and "deviant.’"
"When Paramount bought Laura Schlessinger’s
show, they bought abattle withtheGay community,’"
said Joan Garry, executive director of the Gay and
Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation. "We’re going
to do whatever it takes’" to get the ParamOunt Television
Group to abandon the syndicated show, Garry
said.
So far Paramount has stood firm. and none of the
stations signed on to air Schlessinger’s show have
backed out. In arecent statement, the studio §aidit was
committed to presenting moral and ethi’~fl issues
without "creating or contributing to an en~cfroimaent
of hurt, hate or intolerance.’"
One of the signs carried by the demonstrators read
"No More Matthew Shepards.’" a reference to the
Gay student killed in Wyoming in 1998. Also fueling
the protest is anger over the passage last month of
Proposition 22, which bans same-sex marriage in
California.
"We will do whatever it takes to keep the pressure
on. The strategies will be about advertisers and the
affiliates,’" Garry said, declining to specify whether
that meant station or sponsor boycotts.
Countering the demonstrators were about 75
Schlessinger supporters organized by Campaign for
California Families, a conservauve, nonprofit organization.
"We’re the majority Of people who pay to see
Paramount films and who tune in to Paramount television
shows. We are in support of Dr. Laura being on
the air,’" Said Cherri Gardner, a spokeswoman for the
group.
Conservatives Sue City
Over Partners Benefits
BOSTON (AP) -A conservativelaw firm is suing the
city of Cambridge, claiming that the ordinance that
allows homosexual couples to register as domestic
partners is illegal and unconstitutionhl.
"The ordinance isboth legally and morally wrong.
.. This legal action is necessary to defend marriage
and the family,’" Vincent P. McCarthy, Northeast
counsel for the Virginia-based American Center for
Law and Justice, said Tuesday in a statement.
In July, the state Suprem,e Judicial Court struck
down an executive order issued by Boston Mayor
Thomas Menino that was intended to give health
insurance coverage to Gay partners of Boston city
workers.
The ACLJ assisted the Catholic Action League in
that case and predicted another legal victory against
Cambridge. It also said it planned to file a suit against
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the city of Springfield. The Catholic Action Leagueis
also involved in the Cambridge case.
Under the Cambridge ordinance passed in 1992,
Gay couples go to City Hall and register as domestic
partners. Once registered, partners of a city or school
worker are entitled to the same health benefits as
spouses of city and school workers.
Michael Gardner, Cambridge’s personnel director,
who administers the be~lefits, said he felt the ordinance
was both legal and constitutional.
"It was our view that we should continue to follow
the ordinance passed by our legislative body,’" he
said.
The law firm, which brought the suit onbehalfof 12
Cambridge residents, attacked the ordinance on a
number of legal fronts, but one argument was the one
that succeeded in the Supreme Judicial Conrt last
year.
The SJC had rifled that the" Boston executive order
was "inconsistent’" with a decades-old state law that
granted cities the authority to provide health insurance
to workers, their spouses and dependents.
Gary Buseck, executive director of Gay and Lesbian
Advocates and Defenders, said he would be
happy if Cambridge fought the case vigorously.
But he also called on the Legislature to pass a bill
designed to grant cities and towns the power to extend
the benefits if they chose. The bill has passed the
Senate but is pending in the House, he said.
"The Legislature can put an end to all of this and
~make sure cities and towns have an option of extending
health insurance to all their employees,’" Buseck
said.
Georgia Hate Crimes
Bill Gets Final Passage
ATLA~’qTA (AP) - The Georgia Senate gave final
passage to a bill allowing stiffer penalties for hate
crimes. Gov. Roy Barnes will have to sign off on it
before it can become law. ~
The. origii~ Version of the bill specified which
types ofbigo.try warranted a hate crime, but the House
amended the: measure to be more vague. It now
mentions only.crimes motivated by "bias or preju-
Sen. Vincent D. Fort, D-Atlanta, said he would
have preferred the.originalianguage but was willing
to accept the ctian~e~.
.A jury would, declare defendants guilty of a hate
crime after they were convicted ofanother crime such
as vandalism, arson, assault or murder. The initial bill
would have allowed the judge to make that decision.
That changeprompted Sen. Clay Land, R-Columbus,
to reverse his original vote and support the measure.
~At that time,.I felt the legislation was unconstitutional
because it did not provide the accused with a
¯ jury trial,’" he said.
Under the bill, sentences and fines for misdemeanors
would be increased by half, up to the maximum
allowed, for hate crimes. Felony prison sentences
¯ would be increased byfive years up to the maximum
sentence. Defendants convicted ofhate crimes would
have to serve at least 90 percent of their sentences.
Women Lawmakers Key
To Civil Unions Win
MONTPELIER, Vt. (AP) - A greater percentage of
women than menin the Vermont House of Representatives
voted in favor of the civil unions bill that
passed in the House last week.
Female representatives approved by a wide margin
granting same-sex couples tile benefits of marriage
through civil unions while their male counterparts
turned it down. The women voted for the bill 35-9
while the men voted against it 60-41.
All but one of 32 female Democrats voted in favor
of the bill, while four of 12 Republican women voted
for it.
Although women make up relatively smaller proportions
of each caucus, more than half of the Democrats
voting yes were women, and more than a quarter
of the Republicans voting yes were women.
Rep. Anne Pugh, D-South Burlington, said female
constituents in general asked her to support the bill,
while men asked her [o oppose it.
"It may have m do with the fact that women
traditionally focus on family, and nurturing and relationships
- that women’s identity comes from connecting,’"
Pugh said.
Rep. Michael Vinton, D-C01chester, a retired state
trooper who has been outspoken in his criticisms of
anti-Gay arguments, said he bdieved women felt less
threatened by homosexuality. "For whatever reason,
I feel there’s more fear among the male gender,’"
Vinton said. "Men seem to be more crfical of people
-it’s just our species, probably.""
The trend reflects women’s greater receptiveness
to homosexuals across the country, according to national
policy experts.
"Women overwhelnfingly support Gay aud Lesbian
civil rights more than ~nen, generally speaking,’"
said Paula Ettelbrick, director ofthe National Gay and
Lesbian Task Force Policy Institute.
"’Women identify more because, like Gays and
Lesbians, they have not been part of the system as a
group, and theymaderstand the need and desire to be
a full citizen,’" she said. However, she said the fact
that the Vermont House had passed a civil unions bill
at all "shows that mendike everybody else have the
capacity to change on issues involving their own
communities.’"
The bill passed on a final margin of76 to 69. Voting
yes were 57 Democrats, 14 Republicans, four
Progressives mad one Independent. Voting no were 50
Republicans, 18 Democrats, and one Independent.
N.M. Christian Coalition
Files Phone Co. Benefits
ALBUQUERQUE (AP) - The New Mexico branch
of the Christian Coalition is accusing U S West of
abusing public trust by providing employee benefits
to homosexuals and other umnarried workers. In a
document filed with the state Public RegulationCommission,
theNew Mexico Christian Coalition says the
policy is "offensive to decent, moral subscribers who
want phone service.’"
Edward Lopez Jr., U S West’s vice president in
New Mexico, said he is disgusted to "see-this kind of
hate and intolerance’" in a state as diverse as New
Mexico. Lopez says. the policy is good business. "We
believe our work force mirrors that of our. custom-
: ers,’" he said. "We’ve better able to understand .our.
customers needs and respond to.them.’"
¯ In its one-page filing, theChristian group contends
U S West’s benefits policy promotes the spread of
¯ AIDS and other sexually transmitteddiseases. "We’re
¯ saying there’s a moral issue of unmarried people that
¯ donot deserve benefits. If there is any way to prevent
¯ that from happening, we’ll do that,’" said Mark Bur-
" ton, executive director of the Albuquerque-based
¯ group. The group, affiliated with Pat Robertson’s
Christian Coalition of America, also contends in the
¯ filing that homosexuals are prone to violence and
¯ child molestation.
¯ Linda Siegle, alobbyist for theCoalition forEquality,
called the group’s statements "ludicrous and
¯ absurd, based on every lie and stereotype perpetrated
¯ on people who are Gay.’"
About 2,500 private corporations, universities and
other organizations across the nation provide domes-
" tic partnership benefits, she said.
¯ In its Mar~h i0 filing,’ the New Mexico Christian
¯ Coalition requested the PRC investigate "the social
¯ implications of this heinous U S West policy.’" "The
partners of homosexuals .shouldn’t have the right to
¯ get benefits fromamonopoly when I have no other
choice (for servic£),’" Burton said. " "
The Public Regulation Commission currently as
investigating U S West’s customer rates. Commission
chairman Bill Pope said he couldn’t comment on
anything contained in the filing because the panel has
yet to hear the rate case.
South African Gays
May Give Blood
JOHANNESBURG, South Africa (AP) -
Gay men have a constitutional right to
donate blood, the South African Human
Rights Commission has ruled. The commission
said it was no longer Gays who
were most at risk for HIV in South Africa,
but people in their early 20s.
The commi ssiondemandedthat ablood
bank in Western Cape change its practice
of not accepting blood from homosexual
men. Western Cape Blood Transfusion
Service director Arthur Bird on Friday
said he disagreed with the decision and
was seeking legal advice.
The case came about after Andrew
Barnes, a public relations manager, responded
to an urgent plea for new donors
in the midst of a severe blood shortage last
year. A nurse at Western Cape Blood
Transfusion Service declined Barnes’
blood afterhemarked "yes’" ontheform’ s
question of whether he had had sex with a
man. Barnes had been in a r~lationship
with anothermanformore than two years.
The commission said the decision to
reject Barnes’ blood was ’~discrimination
in terms of the Constitution." It said it
would take the blood bank to court unless
it explains what changes it will make to
avoid breaching people’s constitutional
right to equality before April 3.
Teacher With AIDS
LAKELAND, Fla. (AP) - HIV/AIDS activist
Cathy Robinson was a teacher in
1991, living a storybook life with her
husband, pregnant with their second child.
She and her husband, Dan, went to the
doctor for what was supposed to be a
routine physical for life insurance and
learned theunimaginable: They both Were
infected with the virus that causes AIDS.
Three years later, she developed AIDS.
"My first instinct was, ’I know where
I’ve been. Where have you been?’ "
Robinson said. Then headlines flashed
through her head declaring Belle Glade -
where she had worked with children- the
AIDS capital of the state. She wondered if
she had contracted the deadly virus there.
Buttwomonths later, Robinson, 34, found
out she had contracted HIV from a man
who died from AIDS complications in
prison while doing time for raping her
July 4, 1984, at a Tallalaassee convenience
store where she worked. Privacy
laws prohibited the prison from disclosing
to Robinson that he had AIDS.
She went seven years without finding
out she had HIV. She gave it to her husband
during that time, but her children,
Garrett and Lyndsy, are HIV-free. There
is only about a 20% chance a pregnant
mother will pass onHIV to her baby. With
medicine, the chances drop to 4%.
Robinson, who also wasdiagnosed with
breast cancer two year~s ago, is coping
with her own mortality by spending the
time she has left to promote safe sex and
persuade people to get tested. Her efforts
includ~lhe NAMES Project AIDS Memoria~:
Quilt display, which is being displayed
this month in the Hollis Wellness
Center at Florida Southern College.
Robinson. travels throughout Florida
talking with students, sheriffs’ deputies
and commumty groups about HIV and
AIDS, defying stereotypes of the "typical’"
AIDS victim, as a mamed, white,
middle-class mother of two.
Laws about HIV status disclosure vary
by state. In Florida, it takes a court order
to have someone convicted of sexual assault
tested. "We don’t as a state mandate
testing, and emergency rooms don’t have
time to doit,’" Robinson said. "They (tell)
victims of sexual as sault, ’In afew weeks,
you should get tested.’ "
Assistant State Attorney Sherri
Scarborough, who handles many of the
criminal sexual assault cases in Polk
County, said state statutes allow the court
to order HIV tests of anyone accused of a
crime where bodily fluids are exchanged.
But the victim has to request the tests and
ask that the health department notify them
of the results. Scarborough said she only
remembered two cases in the past six
years when a victim wanted to have his or
her attacker tested. One whs aT0-year-old
woman. The other was a college student.
Robinson was a student at Florida State
University when she was raped. Two of
her attackers were convicted, but a third
man never was arrested. She testified in
the two trials but did not ask that her
attacker be tested because there was no
HIV test at the time. "In 1985, there was
a test. I called right away, but they said,
~Cathy, you don’t need to worry. The only
people who get HIV are Gays and drug
users,’ " she said. Meanwhile, her attacker
was being treated for AIDS in
prison.
WhenRobinson foundout she was HIVpositive,
she said she didn’t tell anyone
for amonth. Thev. two months passed, and
she was about to give bir~ to her son,
Garrett, now 8. "Three nurses refused to
give us care. One, not knowing anything
about me, assumed we decided to have
children even though we had AIDS. She
called (the Department of Children and
Families) to try to get them to take our
kids away,’" Robinson said.
ThenRobinsonmadea choice she could
never take back. She decided to talk about
her story in schools and churches to raise
public awareness. "By going public, there
was no way I could ever teach again,
which was fine,’" she said. "Then they
wiped my husband’s job out of his company.
We paid tbr groceries with credit
cards for a while... Thenwerealized they
were going to turn our lights out. We
moved in with my parents in Clewiston."
Cathy and Dan since have moved to
Fort Myers with her best friend, a nurse.
But they decided five years ago to have
Garrett and Lyndsy, 9, continue to live
with her parents, to ease the transition on
the day the~ know will come. The
Robinsons see their childrenon weekends
and holidays. They write in journals and
make tapes to record memories they want
the kids to remember.
"We knew ultimately we were going to
die,’" Cathy said. "We thought it was
importantfor them to transilion. Wenever
thought we’d still be transitioning five
years later. Our biggest fear was dying
before Lyndsy and Garr’ett were old
enough to remember us.’"
Bill Gregory, an advertising professor
at Florida Southern, fellow AIDS activist
and friend, said Cathy hves to spread the
message. But radiation therapy has made
it more difficult in recent months. Cathy
travels to Miami for radiation treatments
because she can get them free in exchange
for leading educational programs. She
puts about 1,500 miles a week on her
leased Ford Explorer traveling throughout
the state for AIDS education, stressing
safer sex and HIV testing.
"You have to be tested,’" she said. "No.
1, you don’t want others to get infected.
No. 2, they can treat you. If you are
negative, you have a chance to rethink
your activities that got you there.’"
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Are You Gay or Bisexual?
Are You Native American?../,=
Tulsa’s Two-Spirited Indian Men s
Support Group is here for you~.
¯ E~ening support group meetings
¯ Relationship workshops
¯ Short trips, outings and retreats
¯ Free HIV testing
For information call Tulsa Native American AIDS Prevention Project
beginning at the Gay Community Center
¯ at 37th and Peoria and ending at Veterans
Park at 18th and Boulder. The parade will
begin at llam The Pride Festival will
also begin at Veterans Park at 1 lain and
will continue till about7 or8pm, finishing
off the week’s events.
TOHR organizers include Kerry Lewis
as chairperson of the overall effort. "Humanity
United for Haman Rights -Diversity
Celebration 2000," Greg
Gatewood, TOI-IR president and festival
chair,Audra Sommers,parade chair, Lynn
Moesteller, sponsor chair, Mitchell Savage,
media chair, Ktis Kohl, festival entertainmentchair
andNedBruha, incharge
of festival booths and beverages.
On June 3, Saturday, That evening also
at the PAC Doenges Theatre, the TOHR
Follies, not seen for a namber of years,
will reprise, 100 Years of Broadway with
tickets available through the PAC. Tuesday,
June 6th, an art exhibit, "United" will
open and on Thursday, June 8th, there
will be a film night. Locations and times
will be announced later.
For more information about these
events, call the Gay Community Services
Center at 743-4297 (Gays).
And while the organization has not been
in Tulsa for long, already it’s become
active and visible. Soulforce members
along withTOHR, Tul sa Oklahomans for
Haman Rights, marched in the M.L.King,
Jr. Day parade, marking the first time
openly Gay people and groups have partidipated.
And for the kick-off for this year’s Gay
Pride events, Diversity Celebration 2000,
Soulforceis bringing Mel WhiteandGary
Nixonback to Tulsafor aninterfaith workshop
and to lead a Soulforce workshop.
White and Nixon were in Tulsa several
years ago for a regional conference of
i~FLAG, Parents, Families and Friends of
Lesbians and Gays, held at All Souls
Unitarian Church.
Also on May 6-12, in Cleveland, Ohio,
at Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, Soulforce
will hold Soulforce University (SFU) SFU
is arare, one-week opportunity for people
offaith to learn and apply the principles of
nonviolence. SFU is being held in conjunction
with the world congress of the
United Methodist denomination of Chris-.
tianity, General Conference 2000 which
will also be in Cleveland, on May 2-12.
Historically, Methodists have cared
about the poor, the homeless, and the
outcast. Soulforce organizers state, "sadly,
decisions made by their [United Methodist]
General Conferences over the past
three decades have ended that tradition of
caring and made outcasts of God’s Lesbian,
Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered
children. We hope to help end those unjust
and discriminatory policies.
For thirty-t~vo years United Methodist
leaders have debated the issue of homosexuality.
Too many of" their delegates
have ignored the historic, scientific, psychological,
pastoral and even biblical evidence
thathomosexuality is neither a sickness
nor a sin. As a result, with almost
every General Conference the U.M.C. has
hardened its anti-homosexual position.
That position leads to discrimination, snffeting,
and death.’"
Several Tulsans involved in Soulforce
will participate in the Cleveland events.
HEAR the Quilt
The NAMES Project Tulsa Area Chapter
is proud to announce the return of the
Quilt to Tulsa for a major display at the
Maxwell Convention Center December1
through 3, 2000.
The success of a major Quilt display is
dependent on volunteers from our community.
To develop interest and support
for this major World AIDS Day event, the
Tulsa Area Chapter will host a reception
on Thursday evening, April 27 at 7: 00pm
at Fellowship Congregational Church,
2900 South Harvard, Tulsa.
Please join us as we bring together the
community in preparation for "HEAR the
Quilt." We’ll have sections of the Quilt on
display and lots of information about upcoming
events Refreshments will be
served and it will be a great opportunity to
renew old friendships andmake new ones.
For more information you can contact
us at (918) 748-.~1 ll or at
TulsaQuilt@go.com
OK Spoke Club
The OK Spoke Club is begimfing its tides
again. A long ride (20 miles plus) will
begin at Ziegler Park at 7:30am on April
8th & 15th. Water and helmet are required.
A short tide (5 miles) along the Katy
Bicycle path in Sand Springs will begin at
6:30 pm on April 19th. Water and helmet
are strongly reconnnended.
At 9am, a long ride will begin at the
Pride Center, 3749 S. Peoria, rear parking
lot on April 22th. Water and helmet are
required. A short ride will leave from
there at 6:30 pm on April 26th. Water and
helmet are strongly recommended.
For more information, contact the club
at POB 9165, Tulsa, Ok 74157, or emaii
to: Okiebicycle@prodigy.net
Texas Lesbian
Conference
For 13 years now, Texas Lesbians have
presented one of the best conferences in
the US. This year’ s event, to be held at the
Renaissance Hotel, Greenway Plaza on
May 19-21 in Houston.
The conference will feature Urvashi
Vaid, former executive director of the
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force,
cartoonist/cormnentator, Alison Bechdal,
creator of"Dykes to WatchOut For," poet
and author Ntozake Shange and Lesbian
comic Marga Gomez.
Andifthese were not enough of a draw,
TLC offers a variety of workshops on
legal, financial, spiritual and other issues.
TLC is awoman only event for which you
must be 18 to attend. For more information,
write POB 66012, Houston 77266.
Or "call 713-460-3435 for a registration
form. .
Living ArtSpace
New Show
Tul’sa’s contemporary art gall~ery~: Living
Ai~tSpace, now located at 308 South
Kenosha will present exhibition opening
& gallery talk by artist, John Hitchcoek,
on Thursday, April 6, 5:30-8pm.
Hitchcock invites the viewer tobecome
a participant in his installation by encouraging
them to "play games" and receive a
silk screened pnnt or an object. Using
games derived from Native American traditions,
the artist challenges the participant
to make the comparison between
traditional culture and the artwork.
Once upon a time, there was a teenager
named, for lack of a better moniker, Jim.
He was teased most of his school life for
being gay, name calling and threats of
physical violencebeing the
chief tactics deployed by
most of the other kids -the
mainstays of which were
the dreaded "jocks."
He had few friends, but
one of the few he considered
a friend happened to
be Shaun. Shatm was in
choir and on the football
team, and Jim had known
him for a few years, since
Jr High. What Jim repressed
and suppressed
was his physical and emotional
attraction for Shann.
Shaun wasn’t classically
handsome, but something
about him was incredibly
attractive to Jim. Maybe it
was just that, unlike the
other jocks, who singled
Jim out for particular torment,
Shaun always had
treated him with kindness
" ~roadway Damage’
is another little sleeper,
low budget movie that
is actually quite
wonderful...
The film is a ~ood
old-fashloned romantle
eornedy, kind of llke
the old screwballs
eomedles of the 30’s...
It’s a well-wrltten,
well-fihned, well-acted
" story that is sure to
brin~ a smile to
anyone’s face..."
and yes, even friendline,ss. This was !lJghly
unusual. Jim and Shaun s friendship~ew,
and they hung out a bit together. Jim
continued suppressing, and just enjoyed
Shaun’s company, basking in the glow of
their friendship.
At one point, they went to a film together.
Shaun sat with legs spread wide,
his leg touching Jim’ s. Wall, all Jim could
focus on throughout the film was the
sensfition of Shaun s leg against his; the
bea~from the other boy’s body flowing
in~d~s, the fact that he was really uncomfortable
due to the fact that certain feelingSwere
rising., feelings he’d been hiding
from everyone, including himself.
0~things w~re rising too, and he had
no!~deahow tohandle this. He wasn’t sure
ifShaun was doing this deliberately or by
accident. In ~_ospect, it had to be on
purpose. Shfiuns leg never left contact
wi~Jim’s tmtil the film was over. Jim
wasi:terrified.~Did he dare move, and cut
off~ie contact which he really so desperatdy
Wanted?Or should he re~pond?Was
thi~ ~test? Surely Shaun was aware of the
comments and teasing; he’d seen it happen,
To this day, Jim has no memory of
that film or what it was. Just the sensation
of Shaun’s leg and the accompanying
delight/fear.
Jim’s fervent yet deeply hidden desire
was for Shaun and he to bein love. Yet, of
course this could never be. Shaun was
straight-Jim thought. Andhe was ever so
aware of the fragility of friendship- he’d
~aot had many, ai~d would do nothing to
jeopardize this one.
One time, Shaun asked Jim to join he
and some friends for a swim. When Jim
got to Shaun’s house, he discovere~...that
the friends.~were other members of the
football team - the ones who so delighted
inmakinglife aliving hell for Jim. "Well",
he thought,"This should be ablast. NOT!"
To his surprise, they all got along. Jim did
feel incredibly out of place and utterly
self-conscious the whole time they were
around. Had to be careful not to slip up
and steal a glance at the wrong moment,
not that he could see anything without his
coke-bottle glasses anyway.
During the swim day, Shann told an
interesting story: He had entered a bar on
a certain street in. Arlington, Texas, and
thought it was a real cool place - until he
began to notice all the other patrons were
men - and looking at him. Then he left in
a hurry. You can imagine
thecomments this brought
on from the jocksters. It
was all Jim could do not to
ask WHERE. In fact,
Jim did devote a considerable
amount of time to
thoughts onhow to get the
desired information without
giving myself away,
but never could figure out
a foolproofmethod. Some
years later, Jim did go in
search of the aforementioned
place - and discovered
it was in a shopping
center with no sign age or
indications of any sort that
there was anything in the
shopping center. You had
to know where and what it
was to get there and find
the place. Interesting...
Later that day, Shaun
and I found ourselves
alone in his parent’s house. He excused
himself to take a shower, and was in there
along time. A really long time. Jim began
to wonder if he should just go home,
Shaun was in there so long. Then, out he
popped, completely nude - and Jim with
no glasses on! (He was near blind without
them.) It took a lot of control not to look
down, whichhe recalls doing anyway, for
a split second. Shaun probably caught it.
He paused, saying, "Sorry, forgot to take
my clothes i.n with me." Then went into
his room. Jim was nonplused. Here Shaun
is, withakidheknew was teased for being
Gay, exposing himself.
He spent along time inhis room, too,by
the way Jimwas certain this was all atest,
and the slightest wrong move would end
the friendship - after all, Shaun was a
good Southern Baptist boy, going to a
church that literally preached coercion to
get new members.
Yes, Jim knows better now. There were
signals being sent, Jimjust misinterpreted
them. Jim wished he hadn’t, even though
that would have ted to heartbreak. Jim
really was in love with Shaun. Last Jim
heard, Shaun was married, with kids. Sad
thing is, that all Jim had to go on were
negative images of Gayness. That’s all
that was out there in the world then. There
was no "Will and Grace", no positive
movie role models. And All he knew was
that one wrong step could end a friendship,
Or even get him beaten - or, in one
case he read about, killed.
Whichleads me to aDVD review:_"Get
Real". The story is pretty much the same
as above, withnerdy schoNboyfallingfor
upperclassmanjock. Except in the case of
"Get Real", the relationship is consummated
when schoolboy finds out that the
jockster is indeed, homoerotically inclined.
Of course, Mr. Jock is severely
suppressing, and holding on to his straight
identity with every’ fiber of his being. The
film played Tulsa for about a week in ’96
or ’97. I’m sure not everyone got to see it,
so I won’t spoil the ending. Let’s just say
schoolboy .comes out publicly and discovers
his inner strength. He’s accompanied
by a female friend, who remindedme
ofmyfriend Karin, who is now a Lesbian!
More on that later, see Amuse, p. 9
GILCREASE MUSEUM
April 29, May 5 & 7, 2000
Call 587-4811
Church of the Restoration
Unitarian Universalist
11 am, Sunday, 1314 North Greenwood, 587-1314
EUREKASPRINGS DIVERSITYCELEBRATION
-Friday, April 7
- 8:30pm to 12:30am,Dancing in the Ozark Room at the Basin Park Hotel (12 Spring
Street) with DJ Jon Caswell. Sponsored by theMCC of the Living Spring. Cover: $5 per
person. Cash Bar. Must be 21.
- 9pm to 12:30am, Karaoke at Shaw’s Tavern (37 Spring Street)
- 10pm to 2am, Breakfast at thenew Eureka House of Blues (in the basement of the x’~ :w
Orleans hotel at 63 Spring Street) or,
- 1 lpm to 2am, Breakfast at the Eureka Food Court (37 Spring Street)
Saturday, April 8
10am to Noon, Canoe float on the White River. $25 per canoe. Singles welcome- r
reservations and info, call theBeaver Dam Store at 501-253-6154.
10:30am. to Noon, Learn a littl6 of Eureka S prings’ history on a guided walking to,
the Historic District. Meet at Sweet Spnngs next to Rogue’s Manor on upper !:
Street. For further information, call 501-253-0070 or e-mail walking@nwaft.com.
- Noon to 3:30pm "Go Fly a Kite!" Weather permitting, bring your kites and your
cameras.at the beautiful Pond Mountain Lodge and Resort (two miles south on HighWay
23). For more information, contact Judy Jones at 800-583-8043.
- lpm to 2:30pro Head out to Lake Leatherwood Park (off Highway 62 West) for an
informative, guided trail hike. Get there a few minutes early and bring some water; some
walking sticks will be provided. You can also hike on your own on one of
the various trails in Eureka Springs’ "City Park". To obtain a trail map or
for further information about the park, please e-mail lthrwood@ipa.net. For
further information about the hike, call Steve at 501-253-9380 or 9384 or
e-mail gands@ipa.net.
- Please visit the unique shops and restaurants in the Eureka Springs
Diversity Cooperative. Let them know you’re here for Diversity Weekend!
- 3:30pm to 9pm,Check outThe Holein the Wall (191/2 Spring Street) forKaraokewith
Lita! Lunch and dinner will also be served. For further information, call
501-253-8361.
- 9pm to lain; Dance to the high,energy club ttmes of DJ Jon Caswdl at Center Stage
(37 Spring Street). Must be 21. Cover: $5 per person. Sponsored by The Emerald
Rainbow, Mark E. Cook Properties and Center Street Bar & Grill.
- 9pmto 12:30am, Belt out your favorite tunes as Shaw’s Tavern (37 Spring Street) once
again hosts a Karaoke night for "family" and friends.
- 10pm to 2am, Brealffast at thenew Eureka House of Blues (in the basement of the New
Orleans hotel at 63 Spring Street) or,
- 1 lpm to 2am, Breakfast at the Eureka Food Court (37 Spring Street)
Sunday, April 9
- 2pm to 6pm, Join us again at Center Stage (37 Spring Street) for a tea dance and drag
show, with performances by the "girls from Tulsa" and music by DJ Jon
Caswell. Must be 21. Cover: $5 per person. Sponsored by The Emerald
Rainbow, Ermilio’s Restaurant and Center Street Bar & Grill.
- 7pm, MCC of the Living Spring (17 Elk Street) will hold a service. Call
501-253-9337 for information. All are welcome!
For a listing of businesses supporting this and similar events, check out
the Eureka Springs Diversity Cooperative website at www.shimaka.coln/eureka/diversity
or drop by The Emerald Rainbow at 45 1/2 Spring Street for a printed copy.
Oklahoma Repertory Theatre Opens
TULS A-Theatreleaders from twoTulsa : and the Boys" by So. African playwright
organizations, Tulsa Repertory Theatre
and Wayward Theatre Co. have joined
together to create the Oklahoma Repertory
Theatre (also known as OK REP).
Catherine Adkins, Skip suraci. Christopher
Ferguson-Long and Nathan Huntley
will serve as executive artistic director,
advisor, associate founding artistic director
and associate artistic director, respectively.
OKREP,like the companies out of
which it grows is committed to "unique,
professional theatre, children’s theatre,
arts in education and community outreach."
OK REP will open its season with the
Pulitzer Prize winning, "Master Harold
The film translates well to DVD, maintaining
the widescreen image, and with
excellent rarity. Sadly, there’s no extra
features so prevalent now in DVD releases,
such as director’s commentary,
behind the scenes documentaries, etc. It
would have been .nice to have the actor’s
recollections of the making of the film
and the affect it had on them. However,
that does not detract from the fact it’s a
well-written film with an excellent.cast
and beautiful cinematography. The only
thing that bothered one of my friends at
the .initial showing was that jock boy
Athol Fugard. The production will mn
May 11-14 and May 18-20 at Tulsa’s
Performing Arts Center Liddy Doenges
~[]aeatre at 8pm and Sundays at 2pro, and
is supported in part by grants from the
Oklahoma Arts Council and the Tulsa
Performing Arts Center Tn~st.
The play, directed by Nathan Huntley,
is that of a young man growing up and
growxng aware in 1950’s South Africa
apartheid. Tulsa actors Greg Herman, Bill
Thomas and Christopher Ferguson-Long
perform the roles. Tickets are available at
the PAC box office, 596-7111, for $12/
adults and $9/students/seniors. For more
information, call OK REP at 592-6310.
seems to come from a well-heeled family,
yet has a working class accent. I noticed
after he pointed it out, but that did not
detract from the otherwise excellent performanees
given by Ben Silverstone as
the cuteschoolboy Steven Carter, Charlotte
Britain as his friend who faints on
command, and the hunky Brad Gorton as
thejock upon anyone Wouldbe daft not to
develop a crush. Available from Wolfe
Video (www.wolfevideo.com).
Along the same lines, sort of... well,
not really, but there’s a well-done scene
that exemplifies the kind of dynamic I
wrote of regarding seeing that tmnamed
film with Shaun, is "Billy’s Hollywood
Screen Kiss." see Amuse, p. 11
by Tom Neal, editor & publisher
Some Oklahomapolitical observers have noted that the
one good thing for this state about a win by Republican
presidential candidate, George W. Bush, is that we’d get
to send the Honorable Frank Keating, Governor of Oklahoma
packing back off to DC, though others have said
Oklahoma’.s gain might be to the nation’s detriment.
"... ff it were not enough to invoke
this bigoted image ofGay people
-preying on the young, he
foflowed it with a comment about
how Gay people are among the
wealthiest Amerleans. I had
to wonder if next he’d betalklng
about how ’all Black people
have rhythm’ or ’the international
Jewish banking eonsplraey.’..."
This February, t took my’father to lunch at the Press
Club to see Keating do his song and dance. I imagine that
Keating expected a rather friendly reception- these days
the Press Club membership hardly includesany reporters
but rather mostly public relations types - good enough
people but hardly known for hard hitting .journalism.
They’re there to put a nice spin on tttings, not to get at the
truth, typically. Andyou can count on The Tulsa Worldto
report only selectively on comments made there.
Then there was Dad and me sitting right up front. And
dear Mr. "I am not descended from a Baboon" Keating*
likely did not know what he was in for. Mr. Keating
waxed eloquently about how ifwe only re-made government
to be like"’business," and not just coincidentally
turned it all over to the Republiczins, all would be great
with our state. I could nothave a~kedfor a better setup for
my question to the Governor since in Oklahoma, it’s
business leading the way in treating Lesbian and Gay
citizens, well, like equal citizens.
The question put to the Gov. was this: Oklahoma’s
leading businesses,American Airlines, the state’ s largest
private employer, K.imberly-Clark, Dollar-Thrifty Auto
Group whose CEO, Joseph Cappy was just appointed to
the State Board of Regents for Higher Education, all of
these corporations promise not to discriminate on sexual
orientation. Since "business" shows us the way, Keating
* ina recent controversy about teaching evolution in
public schools, Keating claimed he was not descended
from a baboon. The Tulsa World contested that claim.
Operat=on Montreal,. To ¯
was asked why state government was not following their
lead.
Frank’s answer was an embarrassment to the state of
Oklahoma. He said there was not a public consensus to
support treating all people fairly and had he stopped at
this, I could hardly have argued withhim.
But he went on to invoke the most shameful of stereotypes,
saying that the state government of Oklahoma
could not promise to treat Gay and Lesbian Oklahomans
fairly because "a homosexual schoolteacher might try to
’promote’ his ’lifestyle’ to elementary school students
and then the state could not discipline the teacher..."
Andif it were not enough to invoke this bigoted image
of Gay people preying on the young, he followed it with
acomment abouthow Gay people are among the wealthiest
Americans. I had to wonder if next he’d be talking
about how "all Black people have rhythm" and "the
international Jewish banking conspiracy."
I did have the opportunity to say.his allegation about
Gay "wealth" was false but not to question his premises
about promising to treat public employees fairly.
And this, of course, ignores the fact that it is almost
unimaginable that any Gay teacher would engage in
inappropriate discussions - they’re all too scared because
: they know they’ll be harassed or fired in any school
district in the state. Any inappropriate conversation by a
¯ teacher with students, whether heterosexual or homo-
" sexual, already has avenues for remedy.
I agree with Keating, Oklahoma can learn from the
: example of "business." First and foremost, Frank needs
¯ to figure out that discrimination is bad for business and
¯ badforOklahoma. "Business" has figured this out. Ameri-
" can and Dollar-Thrifty don’t go beyond the minimum
¯ federallaw r.eqmresjust because they regreatfolks. Th y
¯¯ do it because they can’t afford to lose good workers and
¯ some of those good workers ar’-e Gay.
It really shouldn’t be that hardfor Frank Keating. All
¯ he needs to do is to reframe the questionin terms to which
¯ he can relate: shall we not include Catholics in our non-
- discnmmattonlawsbecausewecouldn tfiretbemlfthey
mdocmnated our children with the Cathohclifestyle m
schools? Keating shouldknow that itwash’ t thatlong ago
: that precisely those stereotypes were common in thisstate.
After all, Keating claims to be a Christian. And as
: such, he is commanded to "treat others as he would be
¯ treated." That?s pretty straightforward. I’d bet even a
¯ "lower" primate, maybe even a baboonmight be able to ¯
figure that out. The question is can our governor?
by Dave Fleischer
Senior Fellow, Policy Institute
National Gay andLesbian Task Force
Have you ever met ahomophobe? Of course you have,
which is why you might not immediately be eager to
campaign door-to-door using the "G" word when we
need to win an election.
You might be thinking: Holy Roller, don’t a lot of
people go into rant mode the minute we say the Word
"Gay?’"
Actually, they don’t. Everywhere I’ve gone door-todoor
with teams of volunteers,-
once we explain in
plalnlanguage the issue voters
will be facing, the overwhelming
majority are on
.our side. Most of the rest are
undecided. This has been
true in Anchorage, Houston,
and Fayetteville, Arkansas;
in San Francisco, suburban
Westchester County,.in Miami
(nope, not just in South
Beach) and in both Democratic
and Republican parts
of Spokane, Washington. And that’s just the places in
1998-and 1999 that we’ve gone door-to-door in.
Sure, we start in neighborhoods wherewe believe we’ll
find many supporters. But even when we broaden to a
- diverse set of neighborhoods, 60 to 90% of the time,
voters are surprised to learn that the basic rights, of Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered (GLBT) people
are under attack.
"... I don’t want to tell you about
my%exllfe - but ff I’m doing
a job at my job,
should my boss be able to fire me
just because I’m Gay?"
[long pause, she says uncertainly]
"I’ve never thought about that..."
"Well, I’m Gay, and this may surprise youbut it wasn’t
a choice for me. And if I’m doing a goodjob at work, do
you think my boss should be. able to fire mejust because
I’m Gay?"
"I don’t want to hear about your sex life."
"I don’t want to tell you about my sex life--but if I’m ~
doing a goodjob atmyjob, shouldmy boss be able to fire
me just because I’m Gay?"
. [Long pause]
[She says uncertainly] "I’ve never thought about that."
"Well, that’s what you’ll, be voting on. Here’s the wording
that will be on the ballot.
Takealookatit. [Pausewhile
she reads] What do you
think?"
I didn’t make this voter a
supporter. But I did move
her from leaning against us
to someone who might be
undecided. Theconversation
took abouttwominutes. Then
I was on to the next door.
If we’ve trained our-volunteer
team well, we communicate
our key message
within the limits of the voter’s attention span. Then we
ask what they think. And they tell us.
Soinetimes their answer isn’t easy to hear (I didn’t love
Ms. Informed’s ?Gays can change"). Butifwe listen with
genuine interest, and offer a clear, honest exchange, they
return the favor. We usually-leave the door either knowing
we’ve found someone leaning toward us, or someone
who is now open to hearing more.
A...J--~"~’~A~.~,~’A,,’~ (;.... ~Vhenthe~ydo, they say somethinglike. OfcourseI Benefit uur= i i i i i i~i~..,,..; :=~-agai~i’s’t--d~sc~aination, against anybody. I like/don’t care
Localentrepreneurandmouth-about-townactivistNed about/dort’flike Gay people, but discriminationis always
Bruha will present "Operation Montreal" at The Silver
Star, 1565 So. Sheridan, at 10pm on Friday May 5th.
Brnha notes, "’this night of rare comedy and mad-cap
entertainment will aid Audra MarieSommers, an individual
among us who has selflessly impleme.nted her
.talents to l~tter the Tulsa areafor the past decade,,She has
raised money for the poor and the sick." ,
Themoney raised the evening of thi~ event wiR,be ~used
to help Payfor medications, travel and down-time trom
both of lie) jobs for the transgendered Sommers as she
recoups from surgery which will bring her physiology
into correspondence with her gender identity.
This event is called Operation Montreal because after
many years of research, Sommers has chosen worldrenowned
surgeons in Montreal. Any funds raised will
not be used for the surgery. Sommers has underwrittem
the surgery by taking a mortgage on her home.
For more information about this event, call 585-1644,
or write, "Operation Montreal" c/o Ned Bruha, P.O. Box
471282, Tulsa, OK. 74147-1282, or send e-mail to
partygram@webzone.net
wrong."
So the experience of going door-to-door is enormously
encouraging. It’s both productive for the campaign, and
also personally affirming.
This doesn’t mean that every voter is immediately
happy to see us. But as a reality check, here’s the toughest
door I’ve had so far.
Scene: a sweaty August ’98 morning in Fayetteville,
Arkansas; a white senior answers the door
..’...’.Hi, Ms. Informed?" Yes
"Hi, Ms..Informed, my name is Dave Fleischer, and
I’m with the Campaign for Human Dignity. A human
rights resolution is on the ballot - it says that here in
Fayetteville we won’t tolerate discrimination on thejob,
whether you’re a man or women, black or white, Gay or
non-Gay. What do you think about that?"
"Well, I think that if Gay people would just go to
church, they would realize it’s a choice, they don’t have
to be that way". [She went on in this vein for a minute. I
listened.]
Nobody says this work is easy. But, contrary to our
worst fears, it isn’t confrontational. It’s more like the
ordinary experience of one tiuman being talking to another
human being.
And there’s an unexpected personal benefit. If we reopen
our hearts, we are liberatedfrom a piece of internalized
self-hate and our own stereotypical thinking about
the public. It turns out that most of them are human, too
- and more open than we give them credit for being.
Most importantly, voteridentification works. SAVE
Dade in Miami has built a list of.more than 15,000 Gay -
and pro-Gay voters by having dbnversations just like
these, by going door~to-door and by talking to voters
when.they go to vote. Basic Rights Oregon beat back their
last two state-wide anti-Gay ballot measures by doing
voter idenlification on a large scale, and has a list of
125,000 voters statewide.
Sure there are closed-minded homophobes out there.
But they are far fewer and less grumpy than you’d guess
-a mere needle in a Gaystack. If we’re going to win
elections, we need to talk with everyone to find our
supporters. Factis, voters are ready tolistentous,ifwe’re
willing to listen to them. Are we?
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The number of Gays and Lesbians in
the United States is not known because of
largely unreliable studies. Advocacy
groups often claim 10% of the population
is homosexual, basedon surveys ofsexual
behavior conducted by researcher Alfred
Kinsey taken in the 1940s. Other surveys
put the number between 4% and 6%.
Amore direct census question concerning
sexual orientation isn’t likely by the
lime the2010 census roils around. Itwould
take afederal legislation to require collection
of the data. And, advocates say, it’s a
tricky ’question. "Is sexual orientation
defined by feelings of attraction, exclusivity
or praetors?’" Norfllrop asked.
Best known for launching the career of
"Willand Grace’ s" "Jack", Sean P. Hayes,
that’s about the best thing about this film.
It’s got some good moments, but never
quite congeals into a satisfying film. Brad
Rowe, Meredith Scott Lynn, and Hayes
mmin good performances, but the rest of
the cast falls flat, as do many of the jokes.
Hayes stars as Billy, a starving artist photographer
who is the other man in an
unsatisfying relationship he settles for
because (as he. tells everyone repeatedly
in this film until youjust wantto slap him)
he CAN’T FIND A MAN.
He stumbles upon Gabriel (the immensely
appealing Brad Rowe), and instantdysfunctional
crushdevelops, in spite
of the fact (?) that Gabriel is straight.
Hilarity ensues (yawn). There’s the prerequisite
drag queen comicrelief trio, that
should never have .entered this film, because
they are rather pointless to.the plot,
content, and are really so bad they detract
from the film..Obvibusly, theyare ~aeant
to be bad, but all the ~vay t~ough the
opening.sequence~ and at se{~eral points
~(way too many) through the film, they
-..seem to just be inserted for no reason. If
they were doing something that was
plot~orthyand actually funny, itmight be
a good thing. They’re not, and basically
just fill time when the director can’t pull
his head out long enoughto actually make
a film.
This DVD comes with a commentary,
and even that - usually a high point and
asset - is utterly boring. Yes, Sean’s a
wonderful actor -now. OK, Brad was
uncomfortable with thefilm and part starting
out. (Why is never detailed, and that
was what might have been actually interesting.)
OK yes, there are lots ofhomages
to old films, most of which are obvious,
especially with the dream/musical sequences.
Overall, Billy’s a fine addition
to an avid collector ofGay film, for archival
purposes. It’s amusing once through.
But it’s a definite rental, not a keeper.
Also available from Wolfe Video.
An excellent film to have on DVD for
repeated viewings and the extras, is"Gods
and Monsters." It is a most moving and
affecting film, and the disc has lots of
goodies, along with a commentary that
actually IS interesting, adocumentary with
Clive Barker as host, interviews with the
actors, and lots oflovely details. The film,
based on Christopher Brain’s book, is a
look .at what might have happened in the
days leading to James Whale’s mysterious
death.
Whale, the director best known for the
films "Frankenstein" and "Bride of Frankenstein"
in the ’30’s, was found floating
¯ in his pool fully clothed. No answers ever
¯ came out of the investigation. Sir Inn
¯
McKellan, in abravuraperformance, plays
~ Whale, the absolutely dynamic Lynn
¯¯ Redgrave plays his housekeeper and
caregiver Hannah, and the absolutely brilliantandbreathtakingly
gorgeous Br~ndan
Fraser plays a yard man that Whale be-
" friends.
: This didplay the major theatres,butjust
¯ in case, I won’t give away any more of the
." ending than I have. The performances
¯ were all top notch, with nary a misstep.
¯ The cinematography is beautiful, and the ¯
detail in sets, costumes, and styleis dead-
" on.~(No pun intended.) As an. actor, it’s
~ ~really hard.f,0rme to see a film that makes
¯¯ ~m~fo~etI m~watehing~a film. This one
did. I was surprised, as the end credits
¯ were rolling, to find I had tears runmng
: down my face. The film so engrossed me
¯ that Iwasn’t even aware when that began. ¯
It’s an interesting film on many levels,
¯ the most superficial being Whale as dirty
." old man spying on the yard man; and~the
¯ deepest being the comments on aging, ¯
and the families we surround ourselves
¯ with as that happens. The interplay of
¯ straight andGay, andfear. The betrayal of ¯
¯ the body.and time, the interplay between
youth and age, the reasons we make the
¯ choices in life that we do make., all are
." explored on many levels.
¯ It’s definitely worth viewing several
¯
times, if for nothing more than seeing the
¯ details you missed first time around. The
¯ commentary, as opposed to the useless ¯
blathering on Billy’s HSK, is insightful,
¯
informative, and frequentlylamusing.
." There’s enough mix in details of how the
¯ film was made, how attention to details
: was as important as performance, behind
¯ the scenes stories of what went on during
¯ filming, what it was like to deal with this
¯ or that to keep one quite amused.
." ~ And after watching the film go by wlth
" the commentary, especially re~ardihg the
." director’s intentions, it’s kind of a fun
¯ game to play to seehowmuch youpieked
’’up on. ~klso, some historica~ facts_ are
." thrown in, not in a dry, witless manner,
¯ but which augment the viewing Of the
: film. So, for me, it gets a definite. BUY
¯ THIS! Even if you only get the video
~ version (which may or may not have the
documentary), it’s worth it. Available at
; Wolfe Video.
"Broadway Damage" is another little
sleeper, low budget movie that is actually
quite wonderful. A romantic comedy that
actually is, as~ opposed to Billy, it stars
some very talented unknowns in a film
that is well written and leaves you feeling
good. "Nerdy Guy’~ and "Beautiful Boy"
in New York looking for"Mr. RightY BB
is always finding people bad for him, and
pursues one that is really bad news. NB is
seeking Mr Right and has a crush on BB
Enter BB’s roommate Quirk~y~rl. QG is
trying to make it inNYCon hiSrtwn, even
though daddy’s rich. He wants her to get
a job, something she’s never had to do.
She and the boys form a fun trio, and have
merry adventures in NYC.
The film is a good old-’fashioned romantic
comedy, kind oflike the old screwballs
comedies of the 30’s upon which it is
patterned. The ending’s predictable, but
the g~tting there is fun, as with most
journeys. Even if you know where you’re
going,, the trip is never the same twice,
right? It’s a well-written, well-filmed,
well-acted story that is sure to bring a
smile to anyone’s face. It should have
received wider release w~h,en it played the
film houses, but is a gem I m sharing with
you. Yep, available at Wolfe Video on
VHS and DVD.
presents
.... an eclectic mix of choral literature ranging from Baroque to Broadway,
from pop classics of the ’50s and ’60s to a bawdy sea chantey
an~J.an American Folk song featuring the Green Country Cloggers.
,Friday and Saturday, April 7 & 8, 2000 at 8pm
Williams Theatre, Tulsa Performing Arts Center
(reception following)
Tickets: PAC box office, 596-7111 in Tulsa,
1-800-364-7111 or online at www.tulsapac.com
COUNCIL oak a fellowship of gay men dedicated to musical excellence in
the performance of choral literature, providing a source of
pride, unity, and support, while presenting a positive image
for ourselves, our community, and society as a whole.
FOR MORE INFORMATION about the COUNCIL oak meN~S c~or~aLe and its parent organization,
the non-profit Vocal Pride Foundation, visit our award-winning website at www.eouneiloak.org.

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